Cumberland Fams Coffee: Not for beginners

My brother's car is in the shop.

I know the notion of this is a shocking one, as the 2001 Chevy Venture with a busted side mirror, a plethora of dents, and an incessantly flashing "check engine" light is no doubt an unbeatable tank. A well-oiled machine. A chariot.

You know you want one of these babies.

But, as with every heroic icon, with age, their days of glory slowly draw to a close. Their guts expand. Their looks fade. And before they know it, the joints they used to use for running those marathons and lifting those weights (I'm talking to you, Bruce, Arnold...) are now used to predict impending rain.

So yeah. The car is old. And it's in the shop. A lot. So my brother is stranded at home. A lot.

Before I left for my daily cup of caffeine addiction, I asked him if he wanted anything. He said no. Then later texted back asking where I was going for it.

I told him Starbucks, but that wherever he wanted it from would be fine since it's all in the same area.

A simpler being than I, he is perfectly content with gas station coffee.

What's not to love? You dispense it yourself, and can doctor it up to your heart's content. I have been known to have a giant $0.99 coffee or two on my stingier days.

Right as I was about to text him asking him how he liked it and whether or not he trusted my barista skills, he sent me a picture message that proved he did not.

Or maybe he was just trying to be helpful. You be the judge. Either way, I was LOL'ing all over the place.

Kid doesn't mess around with his coffee. :p