Monday, October 29, 2012

no school..... til January

Welp, we still have power. Honestly, I don't know if I believe this storm is going to be anything like what they predicted. At least for us up in northern Connecticut.

My theory is that Dann with two N's Malloy, our idiot fearless governor is running around like a chicken with its head cut off closing down highways and declaring emergencies inland as an attempt to rectify the poor performance during last year's hellish storm.

 Exhibit A.
Simba image borrowed from here. Artwork is a product of pre-storm boredom.

Newsflash, Dann with two N's, overcompensating this year isn't going to make last year's situation any less miserable.

Anyway, nonetheless, here I sit, waiting for Anthony to finish the last of his homework before I head over there to seek refuge from isolation-related insanity. But before I do, I figured I might as well fess up to a confession I have been avoiding because I'm a little embarrassed.

But there is no time like the present, and since I have nothing better to do, I guess I will get to it.

It's no secret that I have had a lot of trouble buckling down and choosing a career. So many things to choose from. I had so many interests, and this list only got longer the older I got. Rather than more concentrated and precise. I was having trouble narrowing things down.

Straight out of high school, I thought I would be a teacher. It seemed easy, and you got the summers off, right? Ha. I'm sure that's what every non-teacher thinks. And I probably still would think that if it weren't for all the bloggers out there who are teachers who write about their work. And man was I wrong about that. What a thankless job full unsung champions. Parents obviously, first and foremost, shape and mold their children. But the second biggest influence in kids lives? Teachers by far. Seriously. Go pat your teachers on the backs. Because they work hard. They earn those summers!

I digress.

Anyway, teaching wasn't my true calling. I loved kids, but my heart wasn't in it. You need more than a love for kids. And I'm not sure I had that "something" that would make me a good fit for teaching.

After that I dabbled in the business end of life, figuring, if I couldn't find anything else, there is always a place for people with a degree in the corporate world, right? I could picture it now -- me walking briskly in heels down the wet streets of New York City with my Blackberry in one hand and a latte and fashionable briefcase in the other.

Ha! That fantasy came to a screeching halt when I had my first Microeconomics class and shit bricks through half the semester before just withdrawing. Bye bye heels, bye bye Blackberry, bye bye briefcase. Bing. Bang. Boom.

In my younger years, I had wanted to be a doctor. Because, what kid doesn't? I believe it's squeezed somewhere between veterinarian and astronaut on the list of "what I want to be when I grow up." When I was a kid, I learned the word "stamina" when my pediatrician told me I had enough of it to become a doctor as he sent me on my way with a clean bill of health and extra paper gowns and culture swabs so I could more authentically "play doctor" to my poor innocent victims American Girl Dolls. Whom were diagnosed with "Strep Throat" and prescribed "the pink stuff" more than any one doll should have been.

With that memory in mind, I took a leap out of my comfort zone, and thought I would give the medical field a whirl. I joined an 11-month accelerated medical assisting program, and loved it. It was great. It came easy to me because I was interested in it. It was the first time I could ever say I wholeheartedly enjoyed school.

I decided I wanted more. I wanted to use medical assisting as a stepping stone to nursing. What's not to love? A career where you get to help people, work flexible hours, and make a decent living while doing so. It looked like the obvious choice. And so I started pursuing that avenue. I looked up what it would take, and re-registered into the community college system to knock out my new plethora of prerequisites. It turned out, to get a measly* Associate's degree in nursing, it would take me four years. That made my face fall.

* "measly" only because it would take for years. NOT discounting those with associate degrees. I just figured if it was going to take four years, I might as well be going for a Bachelor's, you know?

Since this is getting a little long, to make this story shorter, I basically spent the last two months weighing the pros and cons of this nursing business. People kept telling me that if I was this worried about it, then maybe it wasn't what I was supposed to do. I disagreed, but I think more because of the amount of money I spent in the medical assisting program. It was true, the idea of not working in the medical field left a sort of empty feeling inside, but at the same time, that could have been the burning loss of money.... who knows.

One day I was sitting on the computer farting around with my blog design, and I was on the phone with my mom whining about my life's problems. She mentioned for the millionth time her opinion that I should go into photography or web design since that's always what I loved to do on the hobby side of life.

I had always had an interest for it, but sort of shrugged it off as nothing more than a hobby, because of the economy and how hard it might be to find a job. This economy has backed me into an emotional corner. Where I am actually of the belief that the chances of finding a job outside of the medical field are pretty much nonexistant.

I know deep down this isn't true. But I am definitely one to take the path of least resistance. And it got to the point where if it would get me a job nice and easy, I would do it.

But that right there, is not a reason to become a nurse, where people's lives are in your hands.

And last Monday, as I was sitting in my Bio class, hating my life and wondering if I am just too stupid to understand this stuff, a thought occurred to me.

I don't want to do this.

Part II tomorrow. Only because this is getting too long. Not in a "let me leave you hanging so that you will come back and drool over my 'part two'" since I am well aware people aren't even hanging on every word of this post, haha.

Actually, I probably don't even need a part two. I think we all know where this is going. But I do have a fun diagram coming with the second part. There's some incentive, right? :p

Hope everyone is staying safe in the storm! I'm about to be one of those idiots driving in it to get to Anthony's house. Yay! Insanity!