Tuesday, November 13, 2012

365 days of bitch

Give or take...

Here's my issue. I have been trying to slowly but surely weed out my "real life bitching." Why? Because I have been attempting to branch out with the blog, in ways that may or may not land it in the not so intended possession of my offline friends and family.

Unfortunately with the internet, much like the real world, you apparently are not allowed to have your cake and eat it too.

Why can't I have a popular* blog without my corner of the world finding out about it? Well, I don't know, but it probably follows the same logic as having a smoking section in a restaurant, and/or a peeing section in a pool. Know what I mean?

* popular as in assuming my content picks up the pace and starts heading towards interesting, of course.

Anywho, as many of you know, it was mine and Anthony's one year this past Friday. Thank you to those who commented and left messages - so sweet! :)

Not only was it a year marking that, but it also brought to a close a year of crap from my freaking cousin who, for a guy, is quite the little biotch sometimes.  < -- Why it isn't a great idea for my family/friends to know about this blog.

For those blissfully unaware of the back story, here is the super quick cliff notes version so that I can get down to business...

I met Anthony through my cousin by accident. I say by accident because, well, if my cousin knew how it was going to unfold, he definitely would have avoided the meeting. Yeah, you heard correctly. Judging by the way the last year and change has gone down, you would think I stole my cousin's boyfriend or something. He is desperate to be included in everything, and thinks that because he knew both of us "before", it makes us a weird little triangular shaped relationship rather than what it really is, much to his disappointment, Anthony & I, and then him off somewhere in the background trying to muscle his way into the foreground.

For example, Friday, for the whole anniversary thang, we went to the casino. Why? Just because. So I was a little perturbed when I was on the phone with my cousin trying to quell his insecurities about social gatherings happening without him (exhibit A: Halloween), and he admitted to being upset that we went to Mohegan without first asking him to come along.

Yes, I actually had to explain why our anniversary night out didn't have to include him.

And now I'm texting him about why he wasn't included for Halloween. Or, not why, more like, blaming Anthony's brother, because it was his house, and he doesn't have to invite anyone. Which is true.

Now he is actually requesting that I be sure to include him in any Christmas or holiday festivities. And it's an impossible situation because I can't say no without saying a reason, and the only reason is "because maybe I don't feel like it." Which isn't nice. Argh.

Why do I have to be obligated to include him in every aspect of my life? And what's worse is, I know it will be like this forever because he knew both of us before, and so we are bound to him for life.

Family parties with my family would be neutral territory because we are related. Ugh.

Family parties with Anthony's family, he claims he and they are "like family." And Anthony's family is too chill and big and nice to care that one extra annoying person is there.


So basically, in saying yes to Anthony, I said yes to a life filled with my cousin trying to make our twosome a threesome. Which I mean, it was worth it. But still.

I suppose I am being unreasonable. But I would like to be able to use my own discretion when compiling guest lists to my own parties.

I don't know. Maybe I am just caught up in the confusion of him going from resisting the idea of Anthony and I as couple, to forcing his way into everything we do.


4 comments:

  1. Oh boy, that sounds super annoying. I think things change when you start dating someone. You're spending your time differently than you used to, and so is your new significant other.

    I'm at the stage in my relationship where I spend most of the time with Chris and other people. We live together, so we're always home together at night, but it's been four years... I need other people around so I don't kill him ;)

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  2. Don't include him when compiling your guest list. You are not obligated to in the same way you said Anthony's brother wasn't obligated to, despite being "family" to your cousin. You are not obligated to include him in anything, least of all your relationship. The only thing an argument could be made for is family parties. Any other kind of party, or even just regular outings? His insecure garbage is not your problem.

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  3. Oh gosh. Draaaaama! Your cousin needs to understand he can't be invited to everything, ESPECIALLY things like your anniversary night! I mean, what the heck! Do not feel obligated, girl. Do not. Homeboy's gotta learn.

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  4. You have mentioned this before and it still weirds me out. I hope you and Anthony understand that you do not have to be indebted to him forever and should just walk away for a bit while your cousin takes the time to learn a lesson. Trust me, by you and Anthony doing this it will be for the better for both parties involved.

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